Note on Terms: In this article, I use the word Queer as an umbrella term to describe those who identify as part of the LGBTQ+ community. It’s important to recognize that people in the community choose to use many different terms for their identities, and each person’s preferred labels should be honored. 

Humans are drawn to stories. From picture books to novels and our favorite Netflix series, we often grow up attached to characters and immersed in their experiences. In turn, we internalize the explicit and implicit messages in these stories. One of the ways stories impact us is in the selection of characters and to what extent they reflect our own identities. The portrayal of characters who hold similar identities to us can validate our experiences and help us explore our inner world. However, those in the LGBTQ+ community often do not see their identities accurately, if at all, portrayed in media. Heartstopper is one of many recent stories that seek to change that. The collection of graphic novels, now adapted into a Netflix series, portrays the everyday lives of a group of teenagers. Most of the characters in the show are Queer, and the representation has impacted kids, teens and adults alike. The show portrays several powerful messages about identity, friendship, and love.

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Only you get to define your identity. 

Each person’s journey with Queerness is unique. Heartstopper reminds us that only we have the right to define and express our identities in the ways that feel best for us. Isaac discovers his asexuality and comes to realize he doesn’t need a relationship to be fulfilled and have a meaningful life. Nick identifies as bisexual and famously says, “I’m bi, actually” when others assume he’s gay based on his relationship. This highlights an important point that identity is not based on who someone is dating, or whether they’re in a relationship at all. Within one identity, a wide variety of experiences exists. Labels are empowering and important for many individuals, and others don’t choose to identify with a specific label or use the term ‘Queer’ as a way to express their identity. All of these choices are deeply personal and valid. Unfortunately, Queer identities continue to be under attack and are often a debate topic. Heartstopper reminds us that no one’s identity should be up for debate. It portrays a group of young people who intentionally listen and learn from one another’s experiences, seeking to honor the complexities of each person’s journey. Although most of the characters identify within the Queer community, their experiences with Queerness vary greatly. There is space for all of us in our exploration, and we can honor our differences while standing together. 

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Queer joy is everywhere.

Many fictional stories with Queer characters focus on the painful aspects of holding marginalized sexual and gender identities in a society that perpetuates harm against these communities. Often, the characters break up or even die at the end, and stories are riddled with bullying, homophobia, and violence. Queer stories also often face oversexualization, which can contribute to the false idea that Queerness is defined by sex. While these stories represent some real aspects of being Queer, they flatten and oversimplify the complexity of these identities. Heartstopper portrays the challenges of being Queer but also the profound joy and beauty many people experience because of their identity and community. In Heartstopper, this is experienced as everyday moments of connection and pride. Nick and Charlie experience the coming-of-age love story, riddled with snowball fights and going to dances together. Their story includes but transcends typical topics of coming out and experiencing discrimination from others. This can be healing for those in the Queer community who never got the chance to publicly experience a teenage romance due to the barriers in society. It also emphasizes the beauty of young Queer relationships in a culture that often demonizes young people exploring or being proud of their identity. Experiences of Queer joy expand beyond romantic relationships into other spheres of a person’s life. Nick and his mother grow closer after he comes out as bisexual. Elle finds community with other transgender youth through pursuing her love of fashion at art school. Teachers Ajayi and Farouk are two middle-aged male characters who develop a romantic bond and support their students through their journeys with identity. The meaningful relationships the characters experience are shaped in many ways by their Queer identities. 

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We crave belonging.

A sense of belonging is essential for our mental health as humans. Belonging is our sense that we are accepted for who we are within our relationships with others. This sense of belonging can be found in a number of places, such as family, friends, cultural or spiritual groups. Those in the Queer community often use the term ‘chosen family’ to highlight the impact of social networks who step in and provide support that is sometimes absent in families of origin. In Heartstopper, the sense of belonging evolves for the characters as the series progresses. In season 1, Nick grapples with the concept of belonging when he realizes he’s attracted to both genders. He previously had a sense of belonging with the rugby team, but after coming to terms with his identity, he doesn’t feel the same sense of emotional safety within this group. Some characters have relationships of belonging with family members, such as Tao and his mother. The characters find belonging within their friend group and are often vulnerable with one another, which increases the sense of belonging among the group. 

Close relationships are shaped by moments of repair

Heartstopper doesn’t shy away from showing the more difficult aspects of relationships. The characters often navigate through conflict and ruptures, which are moments where a relationship experiences a breakdown. In Heartstopper, the friend group goes through challenges such as balancing time with partners and time with friends. For example, Isaac experiences feelings of loneliness and frustration when his friends appear to be more focused on their romantic relationships than their friendships. Nick and Charlie experience challenges in their relationship. One example is when Nick is concerned about Charlie’s mental health but doesn’t know the best way to support him. Tao and Charlie also went through ruptures in season one when Tao was feeling left out and was worried about losing his friendship with Charlie. However, the series models healthy repair, which is when people seek to connect and understand one another after a conflict. Through conflict, the characters grow to understand themselves and their loved ones better. Isaac expresses his emotions, and his friends validate his experience, apologizing and seeking to do better. Nick shares his concerns with Charlie and asks for feedback on how he can best support him in his mental health journey. Charlie reassures Tao that he strongly values their friendship and wants to spend more time with him. Many more conflicts and repairs take place in the series, and these repairs lead to a deeper connection between the characters.

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Representation Matters.

Representation goes beyond celebrities or shows that represent Queer identity. It also includes the role models and support system in a person’s life. In Heartstopper, the group of teens have older Queer individuals in their lives who give them insight and support in difficult moments. One of the most prominent scenes is when Mr. Ajayi supports Charlie during lunch when he’s struggling with the challenges of coming out. The teacher shares his own experience as a Queer man and validates Charlie’s complex emotions. Another mentor in the show is Nick’s rugby coach, Coach Singh, who is openly lesbian and provides a safe space for Nick as he navigates life. While supportive adults and mentors don’t have to be Queer themselves to uplift LGBTQ+ youth, the power of young people seeing aspects of who they are in older people is portrayed in the show. We also see the impact of media reflected in Isaac’s journey with his asexuality. He often reads books about gender and sexuality, which help him explore his own identity. The show reminds us of the impact of representation, in all its forms, for people of all ages. 

Research shows that positive LGBTQ+ representation impacts both individual and societal attitudes towards the LGBTQ+ community. Exposure to stories with Queer characters can improve societal acceptance and understanding. Representation also impacts the mental health of youth who are in a pivotal time of development, often characterized by exploring one’s own identity. Much more work needs to be done in the media to bring Queer stories to the mainstream. It’s also essential that more stories highlight intersectionality, including the stories of Queer people of color, Queer people with disabilities, and other marginalized identities. Heartstopper is one step in the right direction that reminds us of the healing nature of storytelling. 

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Resources:

• An LGBTQ+ book list can be found at https://lgbtqreads.com/
• Alice Oseman is the author of the series Heartstopper, along with many other novels featuring LGBTQ+ characters‍
• The Trevor Project is a nonprofit organization that focuses on crisis support for LGBTQ+ youth, advocacy efforts, and research focused on the LGBTQ+ community.